So a few months ago my uncle shared with me that he had found me the perfect gift, "Chicken Poop."
Yeah, I got the same look on my face as you and I was confused. He said it was chap stick and he thought of Senor Smarty Pants and I because well, we love our all natural Burt's Bees and aren't afraid to say it! 
Well I received mail last week and look what I have: 
Thats right my own stick of "Chicken Poop" Don't worry there are numerous clarifications saying: "Contains No Poop." 

It also has a quote that cracks me up every time: 
"Grandpa says: "If ya got chapped lips put chicken poop on 'em so ya won't lick 'em" 

Basically it was good for a laugh and its really great lip balm. 

Uncle Troy wrote a letter also and it was good for a chuckle or two. 

    Enclosed is some of the stuff I was telling you 
about-Chicken Poop lip moisturizer. 
You didn't believe me then, did you? 
     I included one for Jer...You know, 
I'm not sure how to spell his name, but you know who I mean. 
Tell him to use his own tube, 
for it's risky to use some other person's Chicken Poop. 
    Tell your old mean Momma I know she's got a birthday coming up. 
She's getting pretty old. Im still older--- and meaner. 

Oh Troy. I better go on write him a Thank You!


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