Even if Everybody Cares

At the urging of my mother I have been posting my blog updates on facebook since just before Millie was born. She says it's something "You need to do! They are so good." But, she's my mom, it's in her contract to say such things.

This blog and I have had a love and slightly hate relationship. You see, I have that with social media outlets and sometimes that's what I see this blog as. I follow blogs, I read blogs, and all of these blogs have hundreds of followers, dive into deep water topics, have beautiful photography, witty punch lines, and eloquent titles. These bloggers get paid to write-because people love to read their stuff and click on their ads. So like a human I go through stages of comparison. What "if" and "when" becomes the game and social media encourages this type of comparison. Who's Pintrest board is the prettiest, who's facebook status is the cleverest, who's Instagram photo is the artistic-ist...most artistic. And it's so easy to get caught in the race.

If I go back to the reason and the day I went to, clicked on create a blog, and wrote my first post it wasn't about any of these things. For a long time only about 5 people even knew about this space and four years later I'm still writing. I was nervous about posting the blog because I didn't want to seem starved for attention. I didn't want people reading but I didn't want them not reading either. As it turns out though, people like reading my writing. The blog stats that I barely pay attention to didn't tell me that either. People tell me that, on the street (because my community is that small-I love it!), in my home, on facebook, in comments on posts, they like my "stories", "my willingness to share" and I'll admit the acknowledgement feels good.

But here's the deal:

I write because it is part of me. I write because it clears a crowded space out in my mind that nothing else can. I write because I love to, because I need to. I write because I have something to say even if nobody cares. 

So I try to ignore the comparison. I try to not avoid the blog because "nobody reads it anyway" because that's not entirely true and who cares.

I will write if no one follows. I will write if everyone follows. I will write if no one reads. I will write if everyone reads. I will write if no one cares. I will write if everyone cares. I will write here or there. I will write everywhere!
Just a little Dr. Suess snack. 

So thank you for reading or for skimming the pictures, whatever your blog viewing style. I am happy you stopped by, but I am not dependent on you. Feel free to check back in again, I'll be here, writing. 


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