Plenty and Pleasantly Busy

I'm a goer. A doer. A task completer. I make lists. I check things off lists. I get a special kind of joy from checking things off my lists. I like looking around and seeing the progress I make. It's been this area of my life that has probably been the hardest adjustment with my new role as Momma. I was blessed that pregnancy didn't slow me down. Heck, the day before Millie was born I was checking things off my list and feeling fabulous. Large, but fabulous. Fabulously large.

But when you have a baby suddenly the things to do multiply by about a billion and the time to do them shrinks by about a zillion. The equation isn't pretty. My time was/is not mine anymore. The days of completing more than one load of laundry, dusting, and whatever else I wanted to do were and are long gone. In the beginning I felt one load of laundry washed and dried became a feat worthy of an Olympic Gold Medal. After all, I did complete it in between dancing around the room, nursing, or changing the diaper of a newborn. And yes, I realize I only have one kid to wrangle. Momma's of the world have moved to the top of my prayer list. We surely need God's grace.

Our hampers became full, our living room was often a clean laundry storage area, our bed remained unmade, and I didn't get to change out my seasonal decor as often (scandal!) My listy, dooey world was a little bit rocked. Don't get me wrong I knew babies were a lot of work and my house and my cleaning tendencies are far from perfect. I knew "my" time was coming to an abrupt end. I just didn't KNOW it. It's just one of those things you don't get until you live it.

It's taken about 5.5 months for me be ok with a kitchen table that isn't clear all the time, a floor littered with baby blankets (and big people blankets), toys, and laundry piling up. My tolerance is higher. However, the questions I was getting from other women weren't helping. "What do you do all day?" "What do you do to fill your days?" and my personal favorite, "Are you keeping yourself busy?" Some days if you came to my house, you might actually wonder these things. In fact right now I'm looking at pints and quarts of canned beans and pear sauce on our table, blankets on the floor, and piles of folded laundry that I'm dreading putting away (anyone else feel that's the worst part of laundry?).

Here's the deal though, when I think back to my childhood I don't remember if our house was cluttered. I do know it was clean, but that other stuff? Nah, I remember baking cookies, building forts, playing dress-up, watching Arthur, singing, dancing, riding bikes, and my room. The laundry and other things didn't make the memories. But the important things did, my brothers, my friends Doug and Lisa, my Momma being home, the red wagon, and the doll named Sweetie Pie. I've got to let the other things go-the things other people say and my own expectations- all for the sake of Millie's memories and my sanity.

The toys will get put away and drug out again. The blankets will get folded and unfolded. The mail will make it to the office and the jars of food to the basement. It will all get done in due time. Or it won't either way-it's not all vital.

So today I answer the age old questions that really aren't "age old". "Are you keeping yourself busy?" Today I loved, I nurtured, I played, and maybe (probably) I became a little more crazy.

P.S. Please don't say the quote about "Good moms having sticky floors and yatta yatta"...I'm sorry, sticky floors are a problem. Sticky is always a problem. 

But mostly and most importantly, I loved and I nurtured and it kept me plenty and pleasantly busy.


1 comment:

  1. Very beautifully said! Welcome to the crazy mom's club!! It's a fantastically wonderful, maddening, beautiful, messy, amazing "job!" ;)